I’ve found that lists help me identify what I’m experiencing. It clarifies the message that might otherwise be lost in a potentially 500-word post.
Here is what I’ve been experiencing with Specter today.
1. I came home from work today and went to bed for two hours.
2. I got up and watched a movie on the couch.
3. But I felt like staying in bed.
4. I washed the dishes in my sink from the past two days. I didn’t feel like it at all.
5. I posted the lyrics/video that explain how I feel right now.
6. I am shutting people out and driving them away. Especially the ones who love and care for me. I wish it weren’t that way but I just feel so overwhelmed. And…
7. …I told them I just want to be alone. I don’t want to talk to anyone.
8. I disconnected my doorbell so I wouldn’t be bothered.
9. I’m a repeater… I’ve had “Will You Save Me?” on repeat for the past 30+ minutes. (see item #5)
10. I’m drinking tea to try to relax. Apologies to my friends across the pond – I put sugar in it, not milk or lemon.